For example, I was raised in the Bible belt where it was customary to wear a dress or at least dress up for church. Where I live now, our church is very casual. It is not unusual to see many, including myself, in a pair of jeans in church on Sunday.
Last weekend, my son came home from church wearing a pair of Adidas black workout pants with a red God's Not Dead T-shirt from the Newsboys concert. I immediately saw his workout pants and asked if that was what he had worn to church. He immediately asked me if I had ever heard the Lecrae's song Church Clothes. I had heard it, and I had to chuckle. He continued, and said, "Jesus doesn't care that I am wearing this."
He was right. In my mind with the way I was raised, I thought, I can't believe he wore workout pants to church. The truth of it was that my 16 year old son had gotten up early to be at the church that morning by 7:30am while I still laid in my bed sleeping. He did the slide shows on the screens in the sanctuary for all the worship and sermon portions for 2 services. I went to one service and then left without seeing him. So, then when he gets home from serving the Lord, I criticize him on what he is wearing.
I couldn't help but wonder what was wrong with me. Here my son desires to go serve the Lord, and I am going to pick on him about his pants. My issue was personal, not biblical. He was perfectly modest in his attire. I was not catching him in sin. I should have kept my mouth shut. It made me think about the story in James 2.
If you discriminate against someone who lives in a particular neighborhood, then that is a personal issue, not a biblical one. If you have an issue with your friend who is gluten free, then you have a personal issue, not a biblical one. If you have a female friend who is having lunch with a male coworker several times a week and not telling her husband, that is a biblical issue, not a personal one. She is lying to her husband by not telling him the whole truth of what she is doing, and further sin could be lurking at the door. You get the point.
I surely don't want to be the one to add rules or conditions to my relationships which are not even biblical. Those would be impossible standards to keep up with anyway. I have really been trying to take every thought captive, to turn it over and over in my mind and to pray over it if it bothers me to see if what I am wrestling with is truly biblical or is a personal issue. Those two things are very different indeed. It has been super helpful to me. Most of the time the issue for me is personal, and I can through Christ cover it with the same grace which has been shown to me.